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Learning social skills to prevent violence

Learning social skills to prevent violence

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Social Skills are the set of specific responses, associated with stimuli or situations generally learned and that are expressed in competencies for a good management of interpersonal relationships, leadership, tolerance and solidarity.

We can say that the Social Skills are:

  • Behaviors rewarded and valued by others.
  • Forms of interaction that generate personal benefits and for others.
  • Verbal and nonverbal behaviors that influence the responses of others.
  • Answers oriented to goals and likely to be learned.
  • Capabilities to generate desirable responses in others.


  • 1 Importance of Social Skills
  • 2 Types of Social Skills
  • 3 How to develop Social Skills to avoid violence
  • 4 Guidelines for parents: Improving their Social Interaction

Importance of Social Skills

Social skills at home

  • They favor contact between family members with affectionate, open, empathic and confident interactions.
  • Promote social skills at home, is to promote an adequate development of self-esteem in its members.
  • In families, they stimulate cohesion (emotional bonding and autonomy) and adaptability (ability to face stressful events and continuous changes).

Social skills in the classroom

  • They facilitate social integration to meaningful learning experiences.
  • The student with social skills is active and interactive, builds his own knowledge, motivates himself academically and improves his knowledge skills, obtaining better performance.
  • Without social skills, the student has poor communication, low academic self-esteem and negative responses such as aggressiveness, rejection and fear, which hinder their performance.

Social skills at work

  • Relating well with others, being understanding and influential generate effective and effective work behaviors.
  • Social competencies such as issuing clear messages, convincing, leading persuade and knowing how to collaborate are the skills of effective productive work teams.
  • Ability to work in teams to achieve goals. They motivate, influence, directing favorable changes for an organization.
  • The most competent and socially valued workers maintain the success of organizations, are able to reconcile, negotiate, create and resolve conflicts. They are "stars" of the organization.

And for all times: Good regards, mutual respect, correct way of behaving according to the occasion that deserves it, handling verbal and nonverbal communication, clear and cordial language, safe and reliable attitudes, knowing how to apologize and giving condolences, accepting defeats, face difficulties, assess triumphs without humiliating, understanding those who suffer, etc.

Types of Social Skills

Basic social skills

  • Listen carefully and actively.
  • Greet and respond to greetings.
  • Start and hold a conversation.
  • Ask a question.
  • Give the thanks".
  • Introduce yourself to other people.
  • Make a compliment.

Advanced social skills

  • Ask for help.
  • Take part.
  • Give instructions.
  • Have your own initiative.
  • Apologize.
  • Convince others without manipulating.
  • Make and accept constructive criticism.

Social skills and feelings

  • Know your own feelings.
  • Express feelings.
  • Understand the feelings of others.
  • Face the anger of another.
  • Express affection.
  • Resolve fear.
  • Self-reward
  • Forgive and forgive yourself.

Social skills and aggressiveness

  • Ask permission.
  • Share something.
  • Help others.
  • Negotiate.
  • Start self control.
  • Defend your own rights.
  • Respond to jokes.
  • Avoid problems with others.
  • Do not get into fights.

How to develop Social Skills to avoid violence

Not hurt

  • Dare to say no.
  • Express without assaulting.
  • Express criticism clearly.
  • Express acceptance and pleasure in a timely manner.
  • Praise with spontaneity and positive feelings.
  • Pose demands, points of view and need for help.
  • Know how to intervene when the moment requires it.
  • Respect the opinion of others even if you don't share them.


  • Record and understand the emotions of others.
  • Know how to interpret the motivations of others.
  • Identify with the perspective of others, their own emotions and opinions.
  • Interpret through someone's facial expression, voice and other nonverbal indicators.
  • Maintain an emotional harmony with others.


  • Knowing how to persuade without deception and bad intention.
  • Handle situations without manipulations.
  • Use creativity, respect and logic appropriately.
  • Be able to consider the interests of others.
  • Create an environment in which everyone is respected
  • Be authentic, flexible and honest.
  • Use your power of trust to make decisions and solve problems.

Guidelines for parents: Improving their Social Interaction

  • Smile, show courtesy and kindness, reinforce your activities, cooperate and share.
  • Motivate making friends and friends.
  • Generate group conversations in your family.
  • Be a model of good behavior for your children.
  • Hold and finish conversations with your children.
  • Express and receive positive emotions.
  • Help issue opinions and positive self-affirmations.
  • Encourage the search for solutions to problems without discussing.
  • Facilitate the anticipation of consequences.
  • Reinforce courtesy at home, the right requests for help.


  • Let's learn to know each other better.
  • Let's learn to know and love each other
  • Let's learn to be with others.
  • Let's learn to communicate properly.
  • Let's master nonverbal communication.
  • Let's look for solutions to a problem.
  • Let's learn to manage ourselves.

In summary learn to HEAR, ACT and INFLUENCE POSITIVELY.

Developing Social Skills is of fundamental importance for a healthy psychological adaptation at all ages and at all times and places.

Clinical-labor psychologist U. Ricardo Palma. Lima Peru